Monday, July 21, 2014

The decision to purge came quickly…



Sometimes you've got to let everything go - purge yourself. If you are unhappy with anything . . . whatever is bringing you down, get rid of it. Because you'll find that when you're free, your true creativity, your true self comes out.  Tina Tuner
 

 The decision to purge came quickly…

 

I made the decision last week really.  When working on the kitchen with RG.  I knew it was only a matter of time before I had to go and toss out all the remnants of a life that I was unhappy with.  However, as unhappy as I might have been, I am not one to ever eliminate anything without great thought and consideration. 

I know myself and I talk about how easy it is to eliminate things from my life.  To take them out and set them aside and move on as if they never existed.  I wonder what anyone who truly knows me would think about that statement.  If anyone who was looking into my eyes and said it was easy for me to just pick up and move on would think.  I wonder if my eyes would say I am lying even when my voice and mind say I am not.

Nothing is every easy for me to move on from. Nothing at all, is easy to walk away from.  No matter how hard or aloof I try to be.  I have said it before and I will say it again in the words of the great Kurt Cobain “I wish I was like you, easily assumed”!  However, I am not.  And no matter how much I try not to feel I do.  Even at a level such as cleaning out my kitchen cabinets.  I still rue and lament tossing out my very first can opener.  Yes it was rusted.  Yes, it was gross, but it was my first. 

The boy who bought had some much hope in 1999 while he was living on Stokes Avenue.  Even when the neighbor girls would run by him as he was coming home singing gordo, gordo to him.  Even though he cheated his way through high school Spanish he still knew the word for fat.  It mattered not; he was going to change his life.  He was going to have the life he dreamed of, he was 22 and the world was his.  That was for a can opener, to this day he rarely used.  So how would he react when he got into more sentimental items?

However, I knew in my heart many things like the can opener needed to go.  Not just because they were collecting rust, but because they were things I was holding onto to help me become the person I want to be.  I was hoping beyond hope that someday my holding would come to fruition.  That I would keep these things as an I told you so.  Fuck you world, I was worth it, it just took me longer to bloom.    

There was the first T-shirt I bought in San Francisco in the summer of 1999.  It was a tidied and it was Star Wars.  I loved that fucking shirt and I wore the shit out of it.  I remember one Sunday at a park in SF I was wearing and some hot chick was like “Oh my god, that fat guy has on a tidied Stars Wars shirt! What a loser!”  It didn’t matter because it was my shirt and I was a Star Wars nerd and any chicken who couldn’t appreciate that especially in San Francisco wasn’t worth my time.  I held it against my nose and smelled it.  I looked at it one last time and I tossed it into the pile.  So that it too could be some vague memory of a life once lived. 

I could sit here and tell you a hundred stories just like that one.  The aqua blue short sleeve button down had a tale.  As did the Navy Blue PWC fleece, I mean how excited I was when that thing showed up in Bloomington.  I got out; I really had gotten out of Indiana with a big time job!  I was so pumped.  However, that was just another thing that had to go.  15 storage boxes of stories about thing I had grown out of.  I would guess through the weekend I purged about $5000 worth of clothing if not more. 

All with the inevitable question of why?  Why toss out stuff that might fit again one day. Why not hold onto it.  Why not keep the dream alive.  That dream of the previous life.  

The truth is even now I am not 100% sure why I needed to purge it all, I just know that I did.  I need to clean up and make space.  Not because I have failed to believe that I can lose weight.  That I can get my ship right and continue on my path.  Not because as I told my roommate how depressed I have been because I just don’t feel like I have come far enough yet.  No, this was depression or lack of faith.  If anything I am fighting the demon depression head on, and I continue to recover faster and faster from its strong grip.  Faith, my faith or believe I will have an amazing life has never faltered.  I know I am on the path.  Things on the path and through the rabbit hole aren’t always what they seem. 

The truth is the need to purge was because I realize now I don’t want to go back to just being thin or being able to fit back into my old clothes.  I don’t want to sit here and hang onto anything.  No, I want to create a new life.  A life that is far less than ordinary.  I want to race, I want to run, I want to fly.  That life isn’t in boxes in the garage. It isn’t in old appliances.  It isn’t hidden away.  No, it out there in between me and my tower, and that old broken life had to be purged.  It had to be thrown out.  There is no going back.  You can never go back.  You can’t change what is.  You can only change now and what will be.   You have to put every ounce of your energy into the here and now, and into this time, and this place.  The old alliances are dead.  They are gone.  There is nothing to go back to.  You can’t fix this, only I can, and only I will. 

I purged old toys, and games that reminded me of another time and place.  I tossed out the first race t-shirt I ever got from W2W in 2005.  I tossed out all my W2W T’s because the truth is I just don’t wear cotton T-shirts and the truth is I don’t want to fit back into something, I want to earn and grow into my new life.  With new adventures, not the old ones, that are the memories that make me, me.  I can’t stop now.  I have come too far.  I kept only those things that can aide me in my fight.  I have not stopped the dream of being who I was born to be.  So, yes, I purged.  I purged because a change is on the horizon. 

So, there we are… Perhaps neither of understand any more than the other what the purge was really all about.  However, I can say this you never really stop loving or caring about something.  You just learn to live without it.  So, sometimes purging is the only solution we have.  Sometimes it is the only way to re-start and start over. 

No comments:

Post a Comment