For Patty

 

 

“I'll say come on, come on, come on, come on and take it!
Take it!
Take another little piece of my heart now, baby.
Oh, oh, break it!
Break another little bit of my heart now, darling, yeah,
Oh, oh, have a!
Have another little piece of my heart now, baby,
You know you got it, child, if it makes you feel good.”

-          "Piece Of My Heart", Janis Joplin

 

“But it's been
14 years of silence
It's been
14 years of pain
It's been
14 years that are gone forever
And I'll never have again”

-          "14 Year", Guns N’ Roses

 

I choked last night.  I did.  Cindy Sullivan looked at me and said Bill speech and I choked.  The black dread had taken me into its darkness and my emotions were running rampant.  Not because I was lost in my own misery but because this is hard.  I am almost a little surprised at how hard all of this is.  So now, I seek redemption in the once place that I know I can find it and that is on the page. 

I know what I it is like when an organization loses its leader.  I know it all too well.  I watched an old regime topple almost a year ago to this day, actually 8 days from now, but who counts.  I know I don’t.  However, what I don’t know and what I am having so much trouble wrapping my mind around is what do you do when your organization loses not its leader but its heart and soul. 

I have watched the world move on from here.  On my perch in my safe haven somewhere in between sales and finance and I watch, knowing that I am both on the inside and out.  I have seen a person leave how had absolute faith in me, he always supported me, and even I was in the middle of the black darkness of my own mind.  Another left that made me wants to be a better person.  Still another that made me never want to disappoint him.  So many have come and gone, which is the way of things, especially in this valley.  However, now I see the heart and soul move on, and my heats hurts because of it.    

What can I say about Patty?  She has a wonderful smile.  A great attitude and is always a pleasure to be around.  She was a great boss.  I never worked for her, but as another manager in the organization I could see that.  Whether it was taking care of Manaz when she was having an episode, or if it was not allowing pushing work over to Megan.  Her people came first and I know they love her even more than the rest of us. 

Patty did a little bit of everything around here.  She was Callidus finance.  She has touched everyone in this company one way or another.  She set us up to go on the duck boats.  She planned events for us.  I don’t know the list goes on.  How do you recall everything that your heart and soul does for you?  I don’t really have the words.  This will never be able to say what I want it to say.  What I need it to say. 

I will say this as I stand at a cross-roads on my very own career I can say I jealous.  I am jealous of not only Patty because she is going to one of the coolest companies in the world in my humble opinion.  However, I am not only jealous but I am also happy.  So happy, it is a battle to keep the tears from falling down my face.  I know that this is a great move for Patty.  Not only a great company but also a great, great commute for her.  Fifteen minutes there ain’t nothing wrong with that. 

Fourteen years is a long time.  I know I was with her here for less than half of her time.  However, like I said she was the heart, and soul of the team I was on.  So, I say thank you Patty.  I will miss you.  The smile that always made me feel good even when I was at my worst.  Our team didn’t get a little worse today, it got a lot worse.  Your new company got better, so much better!  They are the lucky ones now to get see and be with you every day. 

Thank you for all the memories!  Good Luck and long days and pleasant nights!!!!!

Billy b